Mar 102019
 

Neat-o. Ducky. Peachy keen. Copacetic.

I’m feeling all of these words right now, ya’ dig, daddy-o? Because they all used to be far out, groovy, the bee’s knees, and even the cat’s pajamas!

Although I’m not quite sure what’s so terrific about an insect’s leg joints, or why a feline needs bedclothes. Ditto the appeal of edible seeds that grow in long pods on certain leguminous plants which are no longer warm but not stone cold, either. (I’ll pause here while you do the math on that one.)

So as you might suspect, I like to think twice about the phrases, words and terms we use in everyday conversation and don’t normally think twice about. For example, it’s always great to have options, but why is anyone skinning a cat in the first place? Wouldn’t a strongly worded ferral be more effective than a referral? And why do people insist on taking a dump when it’s better to just leave one behind, and preferably in the proper porcelain receptacle?

Part of the fun of language—and English, in particular—is that it’s always evolving, which means some words and terms get left behind. For example, in high school, my favorite English teacher Mrs. Scinto used to lament that we don’t praise others enough for having couth, but instead only point it out when they lack it.

Speaking of word-appreciating favorites, here’s some sung-word play from Pete Seeger.

 

 

[Side note worth noting: You can’t have “crazy” without r-a-y.]

Anyway, in the spirit of the aforementioned folk legend—who shares my birthday, or should I say, shares my calendar birth date, as I came along a few years before he did—here are a few of my own word-play observations.

  • Fact: A dentist doesn’t put a dent in anything … other than your wallet!
  • Does anyone practice second, or even third, aid?
  • Catching a cold makes it sound so much more intentional than it usually is.
  • Why do roosters crow but crows caw?
  • How many incomplete strangers have you met? Also: Most strangers aren’t all that strange.
  • When was the last time you ordered the irregular-sized coffee or fries?
  • Not sure there’s a market for it, but it’d be fun to write for misfortune cookies.
  • So where exactly is Not-So-Great Britain?
  • On the surface of it, a kidnapper sounds like someone who should be welcome at daycare centers.
  • From what part of the tid does the bit come?
  • By the laws of prefixes, shouldn’t construction and destruction be the same thing? Should a new building project be a prostruction? And speaking of, should you project something if you agree since you object when you don’t?
  • I’m still waiting to have licit sex. I think.
  • If you hear something for the first time, is it dundant? Related: Do you have to fute a statement before you can refute it?
  • Why are type A personalities never described as laid-forward?
  • If a “prelude” is something before the beginning, and an “interlude” is something in the middle, than why is “conclude” a verb?
  • I’ve been happy to thus far avoid numerous mitigated disasters. Tangentially, if there were more gruntled workers, there might be less incidents of workplace violence. And it’d probably help if we were more chalant when it came to the feelings of others.
  • For the record: I have never seen fire come out of a fire hydrant.
  • I’ve used the phrase, “This isn’t my first rodeo” numerous times when I’ve never actually been to a rodeo. And I’m still waiting for the first time I’m feeling over the weather.

Alright, time to wrap this up .. you know, because who the heck wraps something down?

 

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